I am in a funk. A huge funk. My friend told me that Santa Ana winds can cause depression by blowing in positive ions into the air. I’d like to blame it on that. There may be some truth to it but I am actually not motivated anymore.
I have several different projects lined up half finished and I just need a push to just finish them. Naptime has gotten shorter lately. Now about an hour long and that doesn’t give me much time to get much done and there is not really much chance that I can finish a project when the kids are awake and beyond that, I’ve messed up on some of my projects and it’s really discouraging. Boo.
I know I just need to choose to suck it up and DO it. My husband is a writer and struggles with writer’s block. I’m struggling with creativity block. I tried to pull myself out of it yesterday and what I did came out sloppy and I had spent the entire naptime on something that I just felt wasn’t good enough in the end. At least I tried, right?
I feel like using the excuse “I can’t.” It’s so easy to hide behind and makes me feel like I am justified to not try anymore. I’ve got to try. I just gotta. But I feel my brain cramping when I try to come up with good ideas or trying to make something new. Sometimes I think that I don’t try because I am just going to fail anyway. Then I remember the movie “Meet The Robinson’s”. They have a scene where they celebrate failures. “From failing you LEARN, by success…not so much.” The whole motto of the movie is “Keep Moving Forward.” It’s a funky movie but a good one, if you’re interested in watching it someday.
I can’t let my fears and laziness win. I won’t let it. I can’t not try. I have to give it a shot. Even if I mess it up. So.. Starting now, I’m going to try. Deep breath and…